The twisted minds of two of the six writers of “Scary Movie” tackle the biggest mega-blockbusters of all time in “Epic Movie.” The story centers on four not-so-young orphans: one raised by a curator at the Louvre (where an albino assassin lurks), another a refugee from Mexican “libre” wrestling, the third a recent victim of snakes on her plane, and the fourth a “normal” resident of a mutant “X”-community. The hapless quartet visits a chocolate factory, where they stumble into an enchanted wardrobe that transports them to the land of Gnarnia (with a “G”). There they meet a flamboyant pirate captain and earnest students of wizardry - and join forces with, among others, a wise-but-horny lion to defeat the evil White Bitch of Gnarnia.
After Elizabeth (Keira Knightly), Will (Orlando Bloom), and Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) rescue Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) from the clutches of the Kraken, they must face their foes, Davey Jones (Bill Nighy) and Lord Cutler Beckett (Tom Hollander). Beckett, now with control of Jones’ heart, forms a dark alliance with him in order to rule the seas and wipe out the last of the Pirates. Now, Jack, Barbossa, Will, Elizabeth, Tia Delma, and crew must call the Pirate Lords from the four corners of the globe, including the infamous Sao Feng (Chow-Yun Fat), to a gathering that will make their final stand against Beckett, Jones, Norrington, the Flying Dutchman, and the entire East India Trading Company.
Captain Jack Sparrow’s life is in debt to the legendary Davey Jones, Captain of the Flying Dutchmen who are supernatural warriors out for blood. Facing possible eternal damnation, Jack must save himself with help from Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann, who must come to Jack’s aid.
1: A true underdog story. 2: Grab life by the ball. 3: Grab Life by the Balls (Australia)
Plot Summary:
Peter LaFleur is a charismatic underachiever and proprietor of a rundown gym called Average Joe’s. The facility’s ecclectic clientele of decidedly less-than-average Joes is comprised of: a self-styled pirate; a scrawny nerd who dreams of impressing an unattainable cheerleader; an obsessive aficionado of obscure sports; a dim-witted young man; and a cocky know-it-all who, of course, really knows nothing. Peter’s humble gym catches the eye of White Goodman, the power-mullet-sporting, Fu-Manchu-d, egomaniacal owner of Globo Gym, a gleaming monolith of fitness. White intends to take over Average Joe’s, and Peter’s non-existent bookkeeping is making it all too easy for him. A foreclosing bank has stationed attorney Kate Veatch inside Average Joe’s to finalize Globo’s takeover of the gym. But Peter’s boyish charms win her over and Kate joins his team of social rejects to beat the odds—and their own ineptitude—to try to save Average Joe’s. How? A showdown dodgeball competition against Globo Gym.
Steve Zissou, sea-film auteur a la Jacques Cousteau, has reason to be melancholy: his partner has been eaten, perhaps by a mythic jaguar shark, his wife may be taking up with her ex-husband, a young man appears claiming Steve is his father (Steve hates fathers), his most recent films have tanked, he’s having trouble raising money for his venture to revenge his partner, and he’s attracted to a pregnant reporter who prefers the pretender. At sea, in pursuit of the shark, will he escape pirates and mutiny, forge the bonds of fatherhood, place his arm around his wife, find the monster of the deep, re-establish box office hegemony, and discover a reason to smile?
1: Over 3000 Islands of Paradise — For Some it’s A Blessing — For Others… It’s A Curse. 2: Prepare to be blown out of the water.
Plot Summary:
This swash-buckling tale follows the quest of Captain Jack Sparrow, a savvy pirate, and Will Turner, a resourceful blacksmith, as they search for Elizabeth Swann. Elizabeth, the daughter of the governor and the love of Will’s life, has been kidnapped by the feared Captain Barbossa. Little do they know, but the fierce and clever Barbossa has been cursed. He, along with his large crew, are under an ancient curse, doomed for eternity to neither live, nor die. That is, unless a blood sacrifice is made. Full of edge-of-the-seat action and swashbuckling adventures, this is a movie you won’t want to miss!
The classic tale of ‘Peter Pan’ continues in Disney’s sequel ‘Return to Never Land’. In a world besieged by World War II, Wendy, now grown up, tries to give her own children hope by telling them of her magical experiences with Peter Pan in Never Land. However, Jane, Wendy’s 12-year-old daughter, sees it all as make believe and refuses to believe in the tales. That is, until the villainous Captain Hook mistakes her for Wendy and abducts her to Never Land in an attempt to lure and capture Peter Pan. Peter Pan’s quest to return Jane safely home is jeopardized until she can begin to believe in the magic of imagination.
1: The Course Has Been Set. There Is No Turning Back. Prepare Your Weapons. Summon Your Courage. Discover the Adventure of a Lifetime!
Plot Summary:
Morgan Adams’ father’s dying gifts to her are his pirate ship and a one-third part of a map of a treasure island - unusually inscribed on his scalp. Thinking herself in need of a Latin scholar to unravel the map, she buys learned slave William Shaw and sets off in search of the rest of the map. However, it is Shaw, obviously with plans of his own, who gets the second part. He’s somewhat easier to deal with, though, than the holder of the last part - Morgan’s less-than-loving piratical uncle Dawg.
Smee, Captain Hook’s Servant/Garbage Sweeper in Kensington Gardens
Smith Maggie
Granny Wendy/Middle-Aged Wendy
Goodall Caroline
Moira Banning
Korsmo Charlie
Jack ‘Jackie’ Banning
Scott Amber
Maggie Banning
Cronin Laurel
Liza, Wendy’s Housekeeper
Collins Phil
Inspector Good
Malet Arthur
Tootles
Robinson Isaiah
Pockets, Lost Boy
Fisher Jasen
Ace, Lost Boy
Basco Dante
Rufio, King of the Lost Boys
Hammond Raushan
Thud Butt, Lost Boy
Directors:
Steven Spielberg
IMDB Rating:
5.80 out of 10 (22996 votes)
Taglines:
1: What if Peter Pan grew up?
Plot Summary:
Peter Pan (Williams) has grown up to be a cut-throat merger and acquisitions lawyer, and is married to Wendy’s granddaughter. Captain Hook (Hoffman) kidnaps his children, and Peter returns to Never Land with Tinkerbell (Roberts). With the help of her and the Lost Boys, he must remember how to be Peter Pan again in order to save his children by battling with Captain Hook once again.
1: They’re back again…and romancing a brand new stone. 2: When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
Plot Summary:
This is the sequel to “Romancing the Stone” where Jack and Joan have their yacht and easy life, but are gradually getting bored with each other and this way of life. Joan accepts an invitation to go to some middle eastern country as a guest of the sheik, but there she is abducted and finds her- self involved with the “jewel”. Jack decides to rescue her with his new partner Ralph. They all go from one adventure to another… What is the story of this “jewel”?
